72nd Le Mans 24 Hours - The Man Who Wasn’t There
Since attending the Le Mans 24 Hours for the first time in 1989, I have been well and truly hooked - writes Mark Howson. Only an unfortunately-timed illness in 1996 prevented an unbroken sequence of visits up to 2003. In fact, when you add in visits to pre-qualifying / test days and last year’s 1000ks, I have made the trip to La Sarthe 18 times in all.

However, a niggling thought had been worming its way into my head over the last two or three years; and that is ‘Do I really enjoy this, or am I just going out of habit?’ As a result, I decided to skip the race for one year to test the validity of the question.

In 2002, I cracked about two weeks before the race and bought a camping pass on E-Bay for the not-inconsiderable sum of £150; and in 2003 the question was side-stepped after the dsc Ed. asked me to help out at the race – an offer that could not be refused.

This year, however, my mind was made up. The DIY establishment in which I spend my working life was starting a refit on June 7, and it seemed appropriate to be there in the crucial early stages. So I told the Ed. that I would not be available in June and told my very sceptical wife that this year I was definitely not going. This year I would follow the race from afar.

So how did I fare? Read on for the diary of my week.

Sunday 6 June
At Snetterton for two excellent British GT races. Receive phone call from Jim – he’s at the gates of Camping Houx, but the people on the gates won’t let him in until Monday morning. He can’t believe I’m not going. Elsewhere, people are discussing travel arrangements for the following few days – hmmm…..they seem to be smiling while talking. Try and block such nonsense out of my thoughts.

Monday 7 June
Gloriously sunny day – try not to think about scrutineering taking place at about the same time that I am sweeping out the building aisle. Arrange with other manager on duty at the weekend, Claire, to swap shifts so that I can watch race coverage on Saturday evening. Check dsc for scrutineering coverage – overcome by strange, restless sensation.

Tuesday 8 June
Get up at 05.00 for a 07.00 start. A long, hot, sweaty day. Get home at 20.00. Read more dsc coverage – restless sensation moves to stomach. Try to console myself with thought that at least I will be sleeping in a comfy bed this week. Attempt fails. Fall asleep.

Wednesday 9 June
Get up at 05.00 for a 07.00 start. A long, hot, sweaty day. Get home at 21.30. Spend half-hour in front of telly before remembering, ‘Crap! Qualifying!’ Turn on PC and try to find Radio Le Mans. Get it to work with half an hour of second session remaining. Talk is of a pretty dull couple of sessions. Peruse TV listings for the weekend only to find that coverage of the race in the UK is pretty sparse, to say the least. Quick rant on dsc forum, then fall asleep.

Thursday 10 June
Officially, day off, but have training at 12.00 until 20.00. Do chores before going. Training finishes early and get home at 19.30. Actually get to listen to large chunk of the excellent qualifying sessions on the excellent Radio Le Mans. Read dsc coverage. Severe discomfort experienced, manifested by unceasing fidgeting.

Friday 11 June
Get up at 05.00 for a 07.00 start. A long, hot, sweaty day. Store manager flies off to Portugal to watch a football being kicked around a field. Start to get distinct feeling that my sacrifice may have been in vain. Claire returns from her training-session limping after running pumptruck over her foot. Get in at 20.15, trying not to think of all those folk in France relaxing on the eve of the big race. ‘Jag’ on forum says Eurosport News also covering race. Read dsc coverage. Feel sick. Fall asleep.

Saturday 12 June
Get up at 05.00 for a 07.00 start. Set vid. for AM and race-start coverage. Notice Le Mans preview is showing on Eurosport when TV guide says ‘tele-shopping’. Interesting! Receive phone call from Claire informing me that she can’t walk on her foot and won’t be in. Nooooooooooooo!!! That means I’m here all day! Kick nearest box, spend next 12 hours getting hot and sweaty. Notice missed call on mobile at 18.00. Listen to voicemail. Jim has kindly recorded the sounds of 48 cars roaring past. Bastard! Phone him back. “I’m [NNnnneeeeeowwwwww] standing near [RRAAaaaaaaaarrrrrr] Tertre Rouge [SSSzzzzzzzyyummmm] with a cold [VVwwwwowww] beer in my [NNNNNNNNEEEEEOooooooowwwwwwwww] hand!” Bastard! Get home at 21.30. Watch recording of start. Half an hour into race, Martin Haven is cut off in mid-sentence and I’m suddenly watching a football preview! B****cks! Flick over to Eurosport News – highlights of Portugal v Greece showing. Switch on PC and RLM. Read dsc coverage. Eyes starting to close. Head back to TV and switch on Eurosport News - highlights of Portugal v Greece showing. Ho hum! Fall asleep.

Sunday 13 June
Get up at 05.00 for a 07.00 start. Switch on Eurosport. TV guide says ‘tele-shopping’. TV guide is correct. Resolve to leave work at 13.00 to watch finish live. Receive phone call from Claire informing me that her foot is better but she still can’t walk on it and won’t be in today. Aaaaaaaaaaghh! That means I’m here all day again! Kick nearest door, spend next 12 hours getting hot, sweaty and bothered. Phone wife and get her to video finish. Get home at 20.30. Rewind tape and stop video at exact point where Ara is waving to crowd from top of podium. I don’t believe it! Too pissed off at finding out who the winner is to be pleased for team and TK. Watch last hour anyway. ITV coverage ends with Rollcentre Dallara hitting barrier. Oh, my God! Run to PC to check Shorty is okay. Thank goodness he is. Read dsc coverage. Fall asleep.

So ended a miserable week, during which I learned that I really and genuinely missed the whole event. What’s worse is that I will have to wait a whole year to make amends. Not only that, but I still don’t know half of what went on.

The moral of the story? I supposed I’ve realised that the 24 Hours is really my French mistress and I paid the price for spurning her. I’m sorry, Ma Cherie, I promise I’ll be back next year.

Now, where’s that holiday-form?
Mark Howson

dsc will be busy following up some of the many Le Mans stories during the next few days. It was an almost unbelievable race, with so much drama and incident to take in: the best Le Mans for years, as many suspected. Wasn’t it Stefan Johansson who said that the Audi R8 was the best sports prototype / Group C / Le Mans car ever? After the 72nd running of the great race, the R8s have become legends in their own time. Never before has one model been driven so hard, survived such impacts and raced on into the record books to such acclaim. We’ll try and pay due credit to all that the R8s and its entrants achieved at Le Mans 2004 – plus the efforts of as many other teams as possible – as soon as we reasonably can. Ed.